As a parent, our children learn from our examples. This includes our good and bad behaviors.
The good news is that our imperfections and mistakes can create a healthy example for our children, so long as we are able to admit to being wrong and learn from the experience.
Being wrong really isn’t a problem and is actually a part of being human. However, being wrong can become a negative when we make it mean something about us.
When you are wrong do you think, “I’m not smart, good or worthy”. Do you feel shame, denial, or defensiveness? These feelings about being wrong can cause rifts in relationships or missed opportunities to learn and grow. We often fall into the trap of thinking that we need to be right in order to be validated or being right is how we show we are smart, good, worthy. If being wrong means this to us, then most likely it means the same to our children.
Children who cannot handle making mistakes struggle and even go to extremes to prove themselves right. These children lie, ignore, and have meltdowns to handle their problems. They also struggle to connect with others and to be genuinely who they are.
When we are comfortable being wrong, we can experience
- that being wrong is a great way to learn more about ourselves
- it is interesting to connect with others that think differently
- mistakes as a great way to improve and get better at a skill
- a greater sense of humor and the ability to laugh at our mistakes
Being wrong is a human condition. As we embrace it, we teach our children to embrace wrongness as well.